Your twenties… a time for learning who you are, figuring out what you’re looking to get out of life, and realizing there are a million and a half expectations put on you.
All of the above can seem daunting. Not to mention, one day you wake up and you’re supposed to be an adult.
One of the most painful things I always had in the forefront of my mind (up until the last 3 months or so) was the reality that my life was not what I expected it to be at this point. Can you relate?
I expected to be married. I expected to be having children or already have one. I expected to have a career that I loved. I expected to have a house… the list could go on and on…
Where did these incredibly high expectations for myself come from? Better yet, where did this time frame come from? Well, I think it’s a mix between what we’re used to seeing in the media – your standard American family – and also what we see going on around us.
There are plenty of twenty-somethings that do have all of these things, and I think that’s wonderful. But it’s not me, and it’s okay if it’s not you.
Now I know it wasn’t meant for me at this time in my life, and I’m at a point now where I fully accept and actually appreciate where I am in this moment and where I’m going.
How did I get to a point of being okay with where I’m at in my life? If I had to sum this realization up into three words I would say time, forgiveness, and acceptance.
First, you have to ask yourself: Why do I feel so pressured? Is it because I feel like a failure, or is it that the people surrounding me are negative? Is it because I’m completely miserable in my job?
Chances are, you’re not living the life you envisioned for yourself. And that’s okay. The sooner you accept where you’re at now, the easier and quicker you’ll be able to get out of this rut.
Once we drop expectations, and understand that we can only control our own selves, we’re no longer able to be disappointed.
Give yourself time to accept where you are in life. It will certainly take a little bit of time, but the main thing is to change your mindset during this period.
The next thing you need to do is forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for beating yourself up for so long about not being where you wanted to be. The past is over, and it’s not your reality anymore.
Someone else would love to be where you’re at in life. Always remember that.
Lastly, accept yourself – all of your flaws, your past mistakes, everything.
Acceptance and forgiveness won’t happen overnight. This is an everyday thing you’ll need to work on.
You’ve spent so much time putting yourself down that you may have forgotten just how incredible you are.
Don’t forget about the things you’ve conquered and the things you’ve done throughout your life so far that have made you proud.
You’re in your twenties – life has just begun. There is so much more to live and experience.
There’s no better time to forgive yourself for your negative mindset and accept yourself for everything that you are instead of dwelling on what you aren’t.
I can tell you one thing – I’m 47 days into my 27th year of life, and things have never been better.
Chin up, girl. You got this.
Wanna chat? Feel free to reach out to me on Instagram @selflovescript. I love hearing your stories.